IF YOU ARE A BLACK MODEL YOU NEED TO READ THIS!!

Hey Luvs,

I found this video on worldstarhiphop.com and I thought it gave a great look into being a black model in the fashion industry. Its sad that here in 2010 an ethnic model isn't able to book the same jobs and campaigns as her white counterparts. Even though, black buying power is at an all time high some fashion houses still believe "black don't sell" and they are sadly mistaken. If we seen more campaigns with models that "look like us" we would be even more compelled to buy. Ethnic women are draped in Louis Vuitton, Gucci, Prada and other high end labels. Do they not understand some people didn't even pay they rent this month just to get the new Gucci bag or Gucci shoes. If our president is black than some campaign and runway models should be too! If you are a model or an aspiring model of color I advise you to watch this video...

Always BSB,
Miss BSB

Whats your fav makeup lines?

Hey Luvs,

I am in dire need of new makeup and because my skin has been breaking out I need it more now than ever!! So do you have any fav foundations and concealers for brownskin. Also what colors do you like on brownskin? I need flawless skin like Eva in this pic <<<<<

Always BSB,

Miss BSB

My Response to Slim Thug "Black Women Don't Know How To Treat Their Man"

Hey Luvs,

I know I am a little late with this Slim Thug story but I just had to add my two cents. Here is another black man talking bout "how black women don't know to treat their man" that is absolutely BULLSHIT!! We hold our men down more than anybody! We understand more than anybody haow hard it is to be a black man in this country!! We post bail, take that long trip upstate, take care of ya kids and ya other kids, help you when you down.,let you sleep on our couch when ya momma kicked you out, help you get a job, support you at ya lowest and be by ya side at your highest. I am so sick of black men making white women somehow better than black women when it comes to treating their man. I know so many women who are ride or die for they man to they end and treat their man like a KING. Slim Thug goes on to say, "Black women need to stand by their man more. Don't put the pressure of  if I'm fucking with you, you gotta buy me this and that."  So white women don't demand money and gifts? They not gold diggers? They created gold digging! When did black men become so damn delusional?? White women in general are taught to marry up and date men with money who can take care of them. Do you really think Susie is with you just because of your personality? If most of the successful black men who date white women took a lie detector test they would be shocked to see how many are probably with you because of their money. Sorry NBA AND NFL players.

What is even crazier to me is when I talk to white men they always say they like to date black women because we don't feel entitled to anything like white women. While black men are saying the opposite..mmmm....let me think? (in my janiya voice) Is it that black men have jungle fever so bad that anything "Katie" does is better than "Keisha"? Or is it that white men see something in black women that black men have ignored.  I know for a fact that all white women are not Suzie the hell homemaker and don't try to dig for gold that's a crock of shit. I know all black women are not attitude having, feisty, disrespectful, gold diggers, who don't know how to treat their man. We all are individuals and to label a whole race of women is totally ignorant. Slim Thug comments were about black women so I guess is mama is included along with his grandma, aunties, sisters and cousins. I bet he would start to re neg if you asked him was he talking bout his momma too.

I just need for black men to stop making white women and any other race of women better than black women. You came from a black woman please show us some respect!!! If the black women you dated were terrible than so be it..but don't label all black women the same. BECAUSE WE ARE NOT THE SAME!Lastly stop this praising off the white woman shit. I am so sick of it. They may have some good qualities when it comes to treating a man and family. But understand they didn't have to go through the issues we do with our men and families. Most of them grew up with two parents and had a better example of how to treat a man. We were taught to be independent and strong hence the phrase "Strong Black Woman" have you ever heard "Strong White Woman"? Nope I don't think so. Most black women are raising their children on their own and in some cases taking care of grown ass men. We are the backbone to our race. Without us I think the black race would definitely be a wrap. We have to be strong and for that reason some of us don't know how to be "soft" or "submissive" because we are so use to be the dominant one in our lives. Don't blame us blame those black men for leaving us to be the "caretaker" and "provider" for our families.

In conclusion, we need to start respecting and loving each other a lot more and stop badgering and talking negative about our black men and women. Dating outside our race is not going to help us no more than talking negative about each other in the media. All I see is black men ain't ish..black women ain't ish..well than none of us ain't ish!! This type of talk just continues the crab and the barrel mentality and it gets us nowhere us a race. If we appreciated each other more than maybe..just maybe black love could prosper.

Always BSB,
Miss BSB

The Fat Ugly White Woman Syndrome

Hey Loves...

Now you probably thinking what is "Fat White Woman Syndrome" aka FWWS well its a syndrome that a lot of black men seem to be suffering from.  Sadly, I just seen this in my apt elevator and that is what inspired this blog write. So I am finally coming home from my Philly trip and  I am on the elevator to my apt and I see this not so bad looking black man with a not good looking chubby checker white woman. Now before I get any nasty comments I am not all against big women or white women!! But when I see my black men date outside they race it always gives me a sting of disappointment, hurt, and anger and as much hate to feel that way I just can't help it. I think of slavery, racism, colorism, the plight of black men, hardships of black women, the now damn there non-existent black family, and the millions of single black women dyng for a good black men. Now, I am not going to give you nasty looks or talk bad bout you and call you a sell-out or uncle tom because I believe in people having the right to do whatever they want. But when I see a black man especially a handsome one looking like a slice of chocolate black man heaven with an unattractive, overweight, white woman I am disturbed. My question is what do you see in her that you didn't see in an attractive more fit black woman?

The obvious is her complexion. The fact that she is white and not black. But is that really all you see? You rather date a out a shape, unattractive white woman just because she is WHITE? Or maybe you like bbw (big beautiful woman) but that can't be the case because their are plenty of big beautiful black women available. Or maybe its her personality? Maybe she offers you financial help or career advancement or stability,  etc? I don't know. But on so many occasions I have seen "Idris Elba" types with FUWW syndrome and it disturbs me. Becasue all I can think is, "This is who you like really?"

It has to be more to this FUWW syndrome that meets the eye. Because when I switch it around and I think of white men who date black women the women they choose always BAD! I have never seen a white man with an ugly outta shape black woman. Not to say that it don't exist but I am only speaking from what I've seen. For example Robert Deniro wife..BAD! Robin Thicke wife... BAD! Chris Noth (Mr.Big SATC) wife..BAD!! Chef Wolfgang Puck wife..BAD! George Lucas wife..BAD! David Bowie wife..Iman.. BAD! Gabriel Aubry ex girl Halle Berry..the baddest of the BAD! and there is plenty more where that come from. But when I go in look at the black men wives/girlfriend in entertainment they mostly are bare minimum with a small amount that I would consider beautiful. With so many attractive white women where is the Adriana Lima's ,Scarlett Johannsens's,  Meagan Fox's, and Jennifer Anistons's standing beside the black men who date white women.  I mean just look at Taye Diggs wife most I go even further. If you are going to interracially date why not get the best of the best. Like Seal and his beautiful wife Heidi Klum. #Imjustsayin There is so many questions that I have for the black men that I see that suffer from FUWW syndrome but most importantly my question is "Are you really dating her just because she is white? Because that's what I think...unfortunately



What do you guys think? Where do you think the FUWW syndrome comes from?

Always BSB,
Miss BSB

Is Princess Tiana a "real" black woman?

Hey my fellow BSB's,


 Lately I have been trying to plan my niece 4th bday party. Her theme was the movie "The Princess and The Frog" and I thought it was perfect now I regret it. Now, I took her to see the movie and I buy her all princess type toys so its only right that she loves princesses. But I've been going thru so much trying to find Princess Tiana party favors and Princess Tiana herself! Well a costumed character to play Princess Tiana for my niece bday. I envisioned her making this grand entrance while theme music plays in the back and my niece eyes just light up..and she says WOW!!!!LOL (which is her fav word anytime she likes something)  But I have not been able to find a GOOD Princess Tiana. They were either too old or not as cute or overweight had tattoos wasn't personable and other issues. It made me think about black women as a whole and the images that portray us are they really representing us? Good or Bad. Was Princess Tiana created based on what Disney "thought" a black woman should be like? Or is there any "realness" to her character? If Princess Tiana is suppose to represent a young black woman trying to find her way in the world why is this so difficult? I know we don't all have tattoos and are overweight or have a bad attitude, etc. I know they are young beautiful black women in the world who resemble Princess Tiana beauty and personality. But why has it been so hard to find her. And why when I talk to people about this situation they tell me what I'm looking for don't exist. Or better yet they make its seem like its damn there impossible. So I ask you is there really a "real life" Princess Tiana? Beauty and personality. And if she does exist can you please send her my way!!

Always BSB,
Miss BSB

BROWNSKINBEAUTIE OF THE WEEK: TIA

Name: Tia
Age: 22
City: New York reppin
Measurements: 34D-29-39

Me: How long have you been modeling?
Tia: I've been acting since early teens and I've started modeling a year and a half ago.

Me:Why do you consider yourself a BSB?
Tia: My complexion and I think everyone has natural beauty no matter what their complexion is.

Me:What do you think of BSB and our movement?
Tia: I support it. I think its a big deal between light skin and dark skin and light skin tends to be the "ideal" of beauty but its not. Black women come and all colors and its good to see brown skin models on the come up.

Me: Pick either or.
Love or money?
Tia: Love. You can have a lot of money with no love. Money can't buy love at least not genuine love.

Me: Hood dude or Corporate dude?
Tia: Corporate.

Me: What's one thing men don't know about you that you wish they did?
Tia: I'm a romantic person. men think I'm stuck up, over the top, and high maintenance but I'm not.

Me: Are you single? If not what type of guys do you like?
Tia: No I'm not single. But I do like men who are honest, trustworthy, and can communicate.

Me: What do you think of twitter/fb and social networking in general?
Tia: It's good to keep in touch with friends. But it's also good to promote yourself and network with people.

Me: Whats your goal with modeling?
Tia: Modeling is to get my foot in the door but acting is the main goal.

Me: Lastly..Why do you love being brownskin?
Tia: I don't have to tan. LOL and of course all the health benefits.


To see more of Tia pls visit her http://www.modelmayhem.com/816427  and on http://twitter.com/TiaRo_OFFICIAL

Gabrielle New Photo Shoot!

See more pics @ http://mediatakeout.com/40920/bikini_bad_gabrielle_union_channels_marilyn_monroe____and_halle_berry____in_new_photo_shoot_for_shape_magazine.html

CNN STORY: COLORISM STILL ALIVE IN 2010 AMONGST BLACK AND WHITE KIDS

Here is a CNN story I found on mediatakeout.com
Very interesting. Colorism is like racism it will never end.
We all have suffered from it but when we get over it?
When will light stop being held at high value and dark stop being devalued?

http://mediatakeout.com/external/40823

THE BEST THAT EVER DID IT !!!

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WOMAN BLEACHES HER INFANT SON SKIN TO MAKE HIM LIGHTER!!

I got this story from mediatakeout.com and there are three things ridiculously wrong with this article.

1.Here it is 2010 and we are still believing lighter skin is better than darker skin.
2. This lady is brown herself and yet only dates light skin men because she believes "brown is dirty" which means she hates herself!
3.This dummy is really putting bleach on her baby skin!! Seriously! Are you that obsessed with skin color? That you will put BLEACH on your baby skin to attempt to make him lighter.

Everytime I see stories like this ..I get so upset!!
People try to love the skin you in lrather ight or dark!
And stop with the bleach and bleaching cremes it does not work!!
Only way to lighten your skin is by having vitilago like MJ or whatever his secret was..
What do you guys think of this story?

Always BSB,
Miss BSB
http://mediatakeout.com/40503/shocking_story_mother_bleaches_infants_skin____to_make_the_baby_light_skinned.html

To Weave or Not to Weave?

Let me start this off by saying I LOVE WEAVE!! I have been wearing weave for so long I like to call my something a weaveologist. YES! Weaveologist! I know the differences between yaki, remy, indian, malayasian and everything in between. Prices, colors, where to buy, what hair is best for certain hairstyles, etc. If I knew how to braid I could sew in my own weaves. Because I know the proper technique to achieve the "natural looking" weave. But lately I've been missing my real hair.

Why? Well I miss feeling the water through my hair weekly and feeling the air on my scalp! LOL Buuuuutttttttttt!!! Natural hair is a damn science experiment. Its time consuming and I feel like I do more damage to my hair when I'm not wearing a weave. Plus I don't have a perm so it takes a lot more work, conditioning, straightening, the whole nine. But I don't got time for all that. I got things to do. LOL And its summer time and once that heat come..I will be looking like Diana Ross! No!

Shoot, I wouldn't wear weaves if GOD blessed us black women with long straight hair that didn't need perms and gets puffy when any hint of humidity hits it. But he didn't so this is the next best thing.But most of the men I meet say, "They love a woman who weares their real hair." Well go get a natural chick because this brownie has chosen WEAVE! (preferably remy hair lol) And if you don't like it you can choke on a piece of cheap ass yaki hair strand. Plus I know that regardless if I wear my real hair or a weave they still gonna want the digits. Two packs of Remy Velvet #1 don't stop no man from wanting a woman! Hello!

So in conclusion I CHOOSE TO WEAVE AND I AM DAMN PROUD!!

Always BSB,
Miss BSB

RE-LAUNCH OF BSB!

I'm starting the re-launch of BrownSkinBeauties. New logo, new ideas,NEW EVERYTHING!! I want BrownSkinBeauties to be a world known beauty brand for woman of color. So I need your guys help with any new ideas to help promote BSB!! So email me bsbthecompany@gmail.com
Can't wait to hear from you!!

Always BSB,
Miss BSB

HOW TO GET SOFT SKIN YEAR LONG!!

Men have always been amazed at how soft my skin is and its so weird to me. Because I thought all women had soft skin but according to my sources this is not true. So here is a few methods I use to keep my skin soft. So ladies take notes because ain't nothing sexy bout rough/dry skin.

1. EXFOLIATE. I exfoliate at least twice a week. Exfoliating gets rid of dead skin cells and noticeably leaves your skin softer. These scrubs don't leave your skin dry like a lot of other scrubs. Some of my favorites are:

Lush Ocean Salt Scrub: This scrub is made of fresh sea salt, lime juice, vodka, avocado butters and coconut fat. It really is a facial scrub but its strong enough for your face and body.

The Body Shop Raspberry Body Scrub: Its made of raspberry seeds and ground walnut shells and it doesn't dry your skin out. If you can't find this one The Body Shop has other great scrubs.



Homemade Brown Sugar Scrub: This is a scrub you can make at home that leaves your skin uber-soft!!!

1 -1/2 cup of brown sugar

1/2 cup of olive oil or coconut oil

1/4 teaspoon of vanilla extract

couple drops of lemon juice





2. MOISTURIZER I am not fond of lotions because towards the end of the day my skin feels like I never put on lotion. I prefer oils and body butters.

Cocoa Butter and Shea Butter: You cant go wrong with these two they are the best for brown skin. In the winter I use these day and night but in the summer I only put them on during the night. Try to get African shea butter and cocoa butter it works so much better than Palmer's. Trust me.

Johnson's Baby Oil Gel with Cocoa and Shea Butter: Put this on directly after a shower and before bed and your skin feels just like a Johnson's baby.

Vaseline Cocoa Butter Vitalizing Gel Body Oil w/ Brazilian Nut &Almond Oils: This works good during day and night but in the summer time I only apply during the night.

The only con is the bottle can go really fast!

Nivea Body Essentially Enriched: This is the best lotion I have ever used. Your skin automatically has a glow and it feels moisturized all day. Make sure to buy the blue bottle not white.



If i really want to feel silky smooth I apply a few drops of Africa's Best Oil (find at local beauty supply store) mix it with cocoa butter & shea butter with a few drops of The Body Shop vanilla perfume oil and baby you smell good and feel good all day long!!!!!



3. Bath Oils and Body Washes Now bath oils are looked over because most of us take showers. But once a week you should take a cleansing bath with some oils and it will transform your skin. There are so many body washes that claim to be moisturizing but really are not. Here are my favs:

True Blue Spa Lay it On Thick Shower Cream: This body wash has shea butter in it and leaves your skin soft and not drying.
AVON Skin So Soft Bath Oil: This is a classic and still works to this day. A few drops in a warm bath and your skin will thank you. For more moisture apply the AVON bath oil spray directly on your skin while wet and pat dry.
Olay Complete Body Wash for Dry Skin: Even thought this geared towards dry skin it works for all skin types. It has shea butter in it and it works wonders.


Final Tips:
1. Exfoliate 1 to 2 times a week. Use a salt or sugar based scrub instead of exfoliating beads or one that seems to be more of a gel texture. Those kinds do not work as well.
2. Apply a moisturizer in the day and night. Cocoa butter and shea butter works best for brown skin. Use an oil/baby oil gel at night. Use a lotion like Nivea during the day.
3. Take an oil based bath once a week and apply a bath oil spray directly after while skin is still moist.
4. Use a non drying soap like Caress, Olay, or Dove and try to use moisturizing body washes daily. Washes that are geared to dry skin gives your skin the best moisture!!
5. Shhhhhh......my secret... twice a month apply Vaseline to your entire body. Leave on skin for about an hour and than wash thoroughly.

HOPE THIS HELP YOU LADIES ON YOUR ROAD TO SOFT GLOWING SKIN!!

Always BSB,
Miss BSB

BEING GREEN AIN'T EASY BUT SOMEBODY GOT TO DO IT!

OK I am trying to reduce my carbon footprint and to be totally honest its HARD! Hard like trying to be a diet and your mother cooking up her world famous fried chicken. Hard like trying to stick to a budget but you catch these GUCCI shoes you've been waiting and now their only $200 when they use to be 400! Hard like going into Target with a list but resisting the urge to buy everything you "think" you need. Hard like laying in the bed with Trey Songz after you just made a commitment to GOD that you'll be celibate. Ummm...Jesus can I start my celibacy tomorrow? LOL

So you get my drift. I live in a apartment complex so my options to be green are limited. They don't even recycle here. But I am going to get my Rosa Parks and get a recycling program ASAP! I cant compost because I don't have a backyard. So I try to limit my usage of plastic and paper goods. And its HELL! Even though you save trees and money you are washing dishes and cloths all the time and its irking. I have cloth napkins, dish towels, plates, and silverware that I am constantly cleaning. Because I am trying to retire paper and plastic goods. Ugh.. But in the words of my brother Kyle, "I rather fight lions then wash dishes!" And that's how I feel now. Being green isn't easy but we gotta do it. TO BE CONTINUED...

Always BSB,
Miss BSB

ERYKAH BADU NEW VIDEO: " WINDOW SEAT" ARTISTIC OR NOT?

As I write this blog entry I am actually listening to Erykah Badu "Next Lifetime" and I so love this song. What a coincidence right? But as the world knows Ms. Badu bared all for her new video "Window Seat". Now unless you were living under a rock you heard all about her body (emphasis on her booty) via twitter, facebook and my ex friend myspace. LOL But did anybody really listen to the song or get her message that she was trying to send? GROUPTHINK. Now I actually thought the video was bland compared to her others the hype was not necessary but anytime people see nudity or a big butt they get excited. (plus I been knew she had a booty) It's just human reaction. But did her undressing to her birthday suit take away from her message?

I say yes. Because all I heard was, "Damn I didn't know Badu had a body like that?" and one of my fb friends said he was "Ready, to get airport security rough with himself to that video." If you get my drift. But I heard few comments on the song or even GROUPTHINK. I also heard a lady say it was like watching a Calgon commercial. Really? I guess. But my question to you is if Beyonce, Rihanna, or even Nicki Minaj did this same exact video would it still be so beautiful and artistic? Or would it be another woman using her sex appeal to sell records? Or another female artist making black females look like sexual objects? I really wonder if it was another black female doing a nude inspired video like this would we really praise her for her "creativity" like people are doing to Ms. Badu. Now don't think I am not an Erykah badu fan because I am a FAN! I am not hating at all. But it's just funny to me how people praise a person for doing something that is taboo but criticize another based on their image. Mmmmmm..... funny right?

But I read on necolebitchie.com , an old interview of Badu, where she sarcastically talks about how to make it the music industry. She discusses how you have to be naked and wear heels and glitter and do something wild to get attention etc. Did she take her own advice? Not necessarily to "make it in the music industry" because she has already done that but to grab our attention. Because I wonder if she had never gotten naked in the video would people still talk about the video? Think about it. But if you know the definition of GROUPTHINK than you can understand why she went to that extreme. She is trying to be the opposite of GROUPTHINK and the video represents that. But does the video represent creativity and art or is it just Erykah Badu undressing in the park. You make that decision.

Always BSB,
Miss BSB

**watch video on her website erykahbadu.com and to all those excited about the video GO BUY HER ALBUM!! New Amerykah Part Two: Return of Ankh IN STORES NOW

Why Do Women ContinueTo Love Men Who Don't Love Them?

I have been a VICTIM of love or at least what I think was love. Maybe it was lust or infatuation I really don't know or care now. I was young and dumb and it was so exhausting on me emotionally during my adolescent years that I am more likely to cry than smile about it. But I can say my past relationship taught me so many lessons. LIKE DON'T BE A FOOL FOR LOVE!!! Yes! I realized you can only love and care about a person so much and its deadly to love them more than yourself. And if they don't do right by you now they won't until they CHOOSE too!

So that brings me back to my title of this blog, "Why do women continue to love men who don't love them?" Maybe its our egos. Meaning we can't understand or accept the fact that this man don't want us or love us back. Maybe we are conditioned to believe that one day this man will love me because he will see how great a woman I am. Maybe we continue to love them because we're scared to love anyone else or we don't want them to have anyone else. Or maybe we are just DUMB! DELIRIOUS! STUPID IN LOVE! Yeah I said it! It's a proven fact that love messes with our mental state to make practical decisions. According to National Geographic.com, "Scientists say that the brain chemistry infatuation is akin to mental illness-which gives new meaning to madly in love."
I truly believe what we sometimes think is love is purely infatuation or lust and we think its love but whatever it is do not give your love to anyone who doesn't deserve it. Don't love anyone who doesn't love you back. Love is to sacred and precious to be wasted. Be smart ladies and watch who you love.

"The worst thing is loving somebody who doesn't want to be loved by you."

Always BSB,
Miss BSB

WHY WHITE WOMEN LOVE OUR BLACK MEN?

Found this artice on the internet @ www.nypress.com and I thought it was pretty insightful to why white women gawk all over our men. The lady was very honest and she basically admitted that she isn't color blind. She see black skin and she loves it! I love the fact that she admitted that race and skin color is her attraction instead of hitting me with bs of "how she can't find a white man" or "love is colorblind" etc stuff. She said it simple she like black men because they are black men. Lets hope black men who date outside they race can finally admit the same thing and stop tryna degrade black women for the reason they date white women. (or any other woman) Because if I hear one more black man say something negative about a black woman to justify his reasons to date his Becky's and Amber's I am going to SCREAM! (i just screamed lol)

http://www.nypress.com/article-12509-a-white-woman-explains-why-she-prefers-black-men.html

What is Black?

WHO YOU CALLING A BITCH????

WHO YOU CALLING A BITCH?? U-N-I-T-Y, U-N-I-T-Y THAT'S A UNITY! Now we all know that song made famous by Queen Latifah. But what happened to the anger she felt when she was disrespected by a man calling her out her name. She says, "Everytime I hear a brother call a girl a bitch or a ho/Tryna make a sister feel low/ All that has gots to go." But nowadays you don't just hear a brother call a siater a bitch or ho you hear females calling themseleves that too. Now men aren't calling a female a bitch and tryna "make her feel low" they just calling all females bitches and even the ones they love nowadays. For example, I've heard guys say "Man, I love that bitch" referring to their wife or girlfriend. Even Busta Rhymes made a song called, "I Love My Bitch" with Kelis singing on the hook. But problem is when did the word bitch become synonymous with all females? Why is the term "bitch" so popular and spoken so often?

What happen to female, girl, lady, woman, or even chick? Is these words extinct? Even on tv shows the word "bitch" is thrown around like it isn't a curse word or disrespectful to women. I remember back in the 90's I rarely heard the word "bitch" on tv. Even in my middle and high school years the word bitch wasn't used as frequently as it is now. I rarely heard it. Make you wonder where has the respect for women gone? Kat Williams says in his stand up, "I'm only calling you bitches because I don't know your name." HUH? That don't make it right. If you don't know my name ask it! Or refer to me as a female not a bitch! So if I meet your mother and I don't know her name I can be like, "Hey Ms. Bitch." Not! And for my females maybe its the female rappers like Lil Kim, Nicki Minaj & Trina who refer to themselves as the "Baddest Bitch" that we feel its ok to call ourselves and our girlfriends bitches all the time. Its not ok! If we don't respect ourselves, how can we expect respect from our men?

I am guilty of using the bitch word too. But it is so commonly used you just start to say it too. But that is no excuse because as of now I will try to retire the word bitch. It's an uglyhabit we all nee dto break. I never ever liked the word and I am constantly telling my male friends to stop calling females bitches. Because ultimately bitch is a disrespectful word. It means female dog and none of us are a dogs! So ladies lets give ourselves back some respect and try to limit the use of the word as much. And men if I can't call your mother, sister, auntie, granny, daughter, girlfriend or wive a bitch than don't call me one. If you get mad when a another man calls a female you love a bitch than that's more proof that bitch is not a good word.No matter how you try to rationalize it or make excuses for why you use the word. It's disrespectful period! So don't use it! So the next time a man or a woman calls you out ya name. Turn around channel your best impression of Queen Latifah and say, "Who you calling a bitch??" U-N-I-T-Y!!! YOU GOTTA LET THEM KNOW!!

Always BSB,
MISS BSB
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TOP 5 THINGS ALL WOMEN SHOULD DO

Number 5. Get Ya Groove Back & Take a Exotic Vacation
I know this sounds very basic but there are so many women who have never left the neighborhood they grew up in. They are like Dorothy in The WIZ, who had never been south of 135th st!! LOL Black women work so hard for ourselves and we take care of our children and our children's children's that we never have time for us. So take that 7 day vacation and not to no damn New Jersey or even Miami go to Jamaica, Belize, Turks & Cacaos, St. Lucia, or Barbados etc. Somewhere where you eat fresh fish and no damn tilapia!! Eat mangoes or some exotic fruit and mix in some rum and meet a local island cutie and GET YA GROOVE BACK!!!

Number 4. Be A Bad Girl Once

Now when you think bad girl you may think of those wild animals on Bad Girls Club. Yes I said wild animals and don't care. But I"m not talking about being like them. No fighting or cursing or acting inappropriate in the public for no damn reason. I am referring to letting go of all of society's rules of how a woman should act and do what makes you feel good. Let ya hair down or up, take a pole dancing class, have a one night stand, curse out ya boss, take nude pictures, kiss a girl or whatever desire you keep hidden. Be a little selfish and do what you want not what others want you to do! Become a sexy siren that does what she wants when she wants and will delicately destroy any person that gets in her way!! Marilyn Monroe said it best,
"Well behaved women rarely make history."

Number 3. Have An Orgasm
Studies show that more than 10% of women have never experienced an orgasm, and 50% of women have had trouble getting sexually aroused at some point. Only 30% of women have reported to be able to orgasm through penetration alone. Do you see the numbers? Women are having sex but not having orgasms. Which is ludicrous too me on so many levels. So ladies please learn your body, what you like, what turns you on, and try to re -create that with your man. The pleasure from an orgasm is like no other feeling. Every woman who is sexually active should experience it. Its one of life's small pleasures. THE BEST FEELING EVER!! SO LADIES STOP PLAYING & HAVE A DAMN ORGASM! :)

Number 2. Fall in Love
Are you surprised I said that? Hehe. Love is a beautiful thing and so few of us get to fall in love. Now I'm talking about true love that "Notebook" ,"Love Jones" butterflies in your stomach type of love. The love that overcomes all obstacles, emotions, and blinds you to the rest of the world. The type of love where you just want to be with him, breathe like him, lay with him, make love to him, have his babies, give up your life just to be with him. And when its over you think you can't live but you do and you never forget about the love you shared. So don't be scared ladies, FALL IN LOVE!

Number 1. Learn to Love Thy Self
This is the hardest of them all. Why? Because we live in a society that bombards us with certain images of beauty that we don't all fit in. Some of us have low self esteem based of what negative things people have told us. "We're not pretty enough." or at all. "You're fat." "You're too dark or too light." You're too skinny, too tall, too big or too small." And if you've been in an abusive relationship or had abusive parents the damage they caused could forever hurt your self worth. Show me a beautiful woman and I bet she has some self esteem issues. But I am telling you love yourself internally and externally. Love your body and accept your flaws because we all have them. Look yourself in the mirror and tell yourself everyday, "I am beautiful." "I am great." "I am me and I love me." This is the hardest one but,LEARN TO LOVE THY SELF LADIES!!

Always BSB,
Miss BSB

Monique Won An Oscar!! But Why are some black people mad?

Some black people mad for the same reasons we was mad for Denzel and Halle win for best actor and black actress. Because they played characters that was more negative than positive. But isn't that all apart of acting. Acting roles of different characters rather good or bad. We can't always play the "hero" or "good guy" but if we play a "bad" character than we shouldn't win an Oscar? I think Denzel Wahington played the shit out of Alonzo till this day people still quote things he said in that movie. "KING KONG DON'T GOT NOTHING ON ME!!" LOL This was really the first time we seen Denzel Washington be the bad guy and he was amazing. Now should he had won for Malcolm X or The Hurricane? Yes! But Al Pacino should have won for his role as Michael Corleone in "The Godfather" but he won for "Scent of a Woman." I think Tom Cruise should have won for Best Actor for his role in "Jerry Maguire" (Cuba Gooding Jr. won for Best Supporting Actor) but he didn't and to this day Tom Cruise has not won any Oscars!!!

Halle Berry role in Monsters Ball was a bit too much for me. Honestly, I never really got into the movie like that. I mean Diddy was in it for gods sake. LOL But when I watched it again today I was reminded of why she won the award. She really did play her character well and made it so believable. Drama, emotion, gritty, that's acting! Was the sex scene extra? Yay a little but she ain't the first to do a sex scene nor the last. And when you look at her acceptance speech you see she was deserving. Now Monique played Precious mom like no other. She is a comedian yet she turned into this serious character and had us all convinced she was this nasty, miserable, villainous character. That is good acting! And she deserved an Oscar because her performance was moving.

Now black people ain't never grateful. We get one thing and want the next. If we got our 40 acres and a mule we probably ask "Why we ain't get 45?" If you look at Academy Awards history to actors of color its terrible. Black actors get more recognition than any other ethnic group. Racism exists but if we continue to complain and not make our own films and create more Oscar-worthy films than we need to relax and appreciate the accolades we get. That is why I liked "Precious" because it was a drama movie with an all black ensemble. (and that's rare) We should be mad that MORE black actors aren't nominated for Oscars rather than what type of character they played. Plus the Oscars are known to give overdue awards not just to black people but all people.(i.e,Martin Scorsese) And I bet if Tom Cruise ever wins it will be for a film not as good as his previous ones. So lets rejoice in our black actors achievements and stop complaining!! Let's be happy they are recognized for they talents and CONGRATULATIONS MY SWEET BABY MONIQUE!!! :)

Always BSB,
Miss BSB

COMPLEXION OBSESSION:NEW DOCUMENTARY

I went to one of my fav webistes worldstarhiphop.com and I seen this video. I would like for you to watch it and tell me your opinion. I only have a few thoughts:

1. Why ask a light/exotic/mixed woman do she see a diff in light vs dark? Of course she won't because she is on the good side of this craziness. She will never see or understand the color complex because she is not affected. (all lighter models said they don't think it exist) People can try to play me with that personality crap etc but we are physical beings. We know what we like and we have our thoughts on what is attractive and unfortunately being "brown" or non-black is not perceived as being as beautiful as some other women.

2. In 2010 , are we really still picking the white doll cmon people! Is it that serious? Now mind you she got a black bratz doll and they are scary. LOL But for everyone in the documentary to pick the white doll I see that as a real problem.

3. Rick Ross seriously tho? The reason you pick more Spanish and exotic women is because more show up. Whatever! On to the next one. Cassidy is right unfortunately men and women have subconsciously went with lighter counterparts because we grew up believing they were more beautiful.

4. We would not be having this discussion so much if videos would atleast show some variety. For once, please have a mix of different women and maybe black women would not continue to complain. All we see is our black male artists with damn there all light/mixed/exotic models around them. How can you not feel some type of way. Make you wonder is brown not good enough?

5. The color complex is alive and well. Just like racism is don't get fooled because Obama is in office. Some things will never change but what we can change is our attitudes. To all my Brownies don't let this affect you negatively! You are beautiful regardless of what standard of beauty is portrayed in the world.

Always BSB,
Miss BSB

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"Your Pretty to be Dark-Skinned" is NOT A COMPLIMENT!!

Being a brownie I have heard this on more than one occasion and it always leaves me with a bad feeling. WHY? Because it makes me wonder, "Why am I pretty to be dark-skinned?" As if, being brown was an automatic cause for being ugly or unattractive. Is every lightskin girl pretty? No. Is every white woman, Asian, Puerto Rican, Indian etc, woman attractive? No. neither is every brownie but we are all beautiful in our own ways. There is someone that will be attracted to each of our own beauty.

All brownies are not unattractive! We all are unique and you can't judge us based on one view. Look at Michelle Obama, Naomi Campbell, Nia Long, Jessica White, Chilli, Reagon Gomez, Iman, Beverley Johnson, Kenya Moore, Carla Campbelll, Tatanya Ali, Keisha Knight- Pulliam, Gabrielle Union, Kelly Rowland etc., and all the non-famous brownies who walk the streets everyday. So next time you see a brownie and she is attractive, just say, "You're beautiful." "You're pretty." "You are gorgeous." Nothing more. Nothing less. Not she is pretty because of our skin color but because she is just that..pretty.

Always BSB,
Miss BSB

SHAME: 9 yr old girl hates her brownskin!

Once again another little black girl hates her complexion. I am so over this! I went to one of my fav websites Worldstarhiphop.com where I came pass this video of the Tyra Banks show that said, "Beautiful 9 yr old girl on Tyra saying she wish she was light-skinned so boys will like her." OMG Now Tyra Banks is famous for these light vs. dark and color complex issues on her show. (which can really get annoying after a while)But this one video hit me hard. So hard that I had to blog it. Why?

Well, because I was this little girl at some point. I grew up wanting to be lightskinned and have the long "good" hair and pretty eyes. Granted my father is darker than me has light brown eyes and my brother got them. Bastard! LOL And everyone use to say , "How come your eyes not like Jarrett?" I used to be so mad. Plus my father side is native american and black so my aunts and cousins have that pochontas hair but that skipped me too. But back to my point. So I used to look at some of my classmates and neighborhood friends and want to be like them. Never to the extreme where I hated my skin color or hair. But I always wondered if my life was better if I was lighter because it seemed like the lighter girls got all the attention. Now boys liked me and I was always told I was pretty and I never felt ugly. But I did feel the color complex and the difference in how people treated light-skin girls and brownies. Fortunately, for me I got over it and moved on and accepted myself for me. I sometimes still have my moments where I feel inferior to lighter girls and its not because I am not confident. But when you go to the club or look at the media you just start to wonder is it really better being light?

Now, this little girl is either going to accept her skin color and be the baddest brown skin girl alive. Or she is going to forever be ashamed of her complexion. I pray for the latter. Because it is unfair that us brownie have to go through this! It has been going on for hundreds and hundreds of years. When will it ever stop! Maybe colorism is like racism it will never end because it is truly a mental thing that is taught based on your upbringing and environment. I created BrownSkinBeauties for this exact reason to change the thought processes of both the women who suffer from the color complex and the men who feed into it.

Men, especially black men make it so hard for us brownies. And dark skin men are the worst ones. The are the ones who are quick to praise a lightskin girl over a brownie before a lightskin or white man. (when we same complexion!)I say this, because I have personally experienced it. I do believe it's because they suffer from the color complex themselves and to date a person of the same complexion would be to much for their own color issues. Dating a lighter, white or exotic woman makes them feel more like "the man" because a brownie is just not good enough for them. Sometimes I feel like its a cover up for their own self issues and dating someone lighter makes them feel more attractive or accepting of themselves. But this mental state of beauty, hurts the black communtiy, and any other race that suffers from color complex issues. Not only do we have the media, "white standard of beauty" we now have our own black men telling us that we are not beautiful. Treating us as second rate. There is no reason why I have more white men praising my mocha skin color than my own black men. And when you're a child, everything seems so much more harder. It hurts so much more so I know what this 9 yr old girl is feeling. It is not easy to just brush it off when the boy you like is constantly looking over you for the pretty "lightskin girl."

In closing, I am going to need for this color complex ish to stop! Is it going to stop tommorow? No. Is it ever going to stop? I don't think so because it is so much deeper than we think. We have to change how we think and create new standards of beauty because that is the only way we can really step into the right direction. I hope this 9 yr old girl and all the young brownies out there will eventually build their confidence and accept and love their brownskin. Your brownskin is beautiful and do not let anyone tell you any different. Because in 2010, I am not giving into this light vs. dark, I am no longer feeling second to light skin girls or letting any video, media outlet, or man depict my beauty. BROWNSKIN IS IN!!!! AND IM LOVIN IT!! (in my mcd's voice) :)

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Judgement? Where they do that at?

They do judgement everywhere! Why? I do not understand because no one on this earth is better than anyone. Yes I said it! To all those holier than-thous and those who think they are better than anyone. Now to all the religious people who pass judgement let me tell you something. We are all sinners, we fall victim to sin, and we all have faults. Just because you go to church, mosque, hall, synagogue or any other place of worship do not make you better than anyone. Because some of the same people are at the club drinking and fornicating the day before and after.
So when people pull that religious card with you go and ask them when they last time they sinned. Trust. It wasn't to long ago. GOD sees all things good and bad.

Now to the hating ass, ignorant ass folks that judge people based on their own personal opinions. Fuck off! I love how these decepticons are quick to judge people based on their own ignorant thoughts but inside wish they could do what you doing. These people make judgements about people they do not know and subject matters where they have no real information. People like this are usually ignorant, self-absorbed, and usually jealous. Most of no clue of the real world and only live in their little boxes and think that people should live their life according to their standards. NOT! Once again FUCK OFF!

Than you have the hypocrites. People who judge you but than go ahead and do the same things that they are judging you for. Or they criticize you for the same things they did in their past but now because they "saved" or they feel its a new day, they judge you. Chile please! For example, a man who tells his son not to abuse woman but yet he beats on females. A woman who looks down on women who strip but yet they dancing half butt naked in the club every sat night, drunker than a skunk, and than one night stands a guy. These women are the ones who quick to jump on any pole in the club or train station but judge the ones who make a living from it to feed they kids, pay for school or etc. Chile please! The men who claim not to like gay people yet they daydreaming about Morris Chestnut at night. DL losers. The women who say, "Why she got so many kids? or Why she 16 and pregnant? But they forgot they was 17 and pregnant before or had multiple abortions or gave their baby up for adoption. Or the women who talk bad about escorts/prostitutes but yet they been ran through they whole neighborhood. Atleast they getting paid for giving it up and you getting gang banged by Tyrone and them for nothing! The man who talks bad about Tiger Woods yet he cheats on his wife when he goes on business trips. I could go on and on.

But I know this people stop the judgement! We all are human and not one of us are better than anyone else. We all fall to sin and we all have flaws. None of us are perfect. We all have old skeletons in our past so who are we to judge and no one should judge us for our faults. So unless you are GOD himself please DO NOT JUDGE!

Always BSB,
Miss BSB

Black Women: Know Your Self Worth

I know too many women who have been with men they was not worth a penny! Not even a penny with a hole in it! They was worthless! But it boggled my mind that these beautiful, brilliant, educated, loving women was with these "good for nuthin" men. Some say it was because of love, sex, or because they was comfortable and did not want to find another mate. But it boils down to SELF-WORTH.

If you know you are deserving of a man that would love you unconditionally and will appreciate and love you despite your flaws; and not mistreat,abuse,or cheat on you than you are on the right path. As women of the new millenium, we feel because there are so few available men, we have to take whomever we can get. But baby that is not true! Yes there are more females than males but does that mean you settle for anything? When you settle for anything you become unhappy and eventually misery will breed its ugly head.

Men are way smarter than we think. They know they aint shit. They know that they are using you. They know as long as you have low self-esteem your not gonna leave them. That is why they say, "stay away from friends" and "your mom don't know what she talking bout." Or they criticize anything or anyone that they think will make you a better person.(really anything that will make you know your self -worth and leave they ass!)They know that they don't have to work because my "ol' lady got it." They know that as long as they say a couple of "I love you's" and give you good sex your going to forgive them everytime. Men know this! They know what they can and can not do to their wives and girlfriends. But we fall for it everytime. It's like we have a complex. We think its ok for him to cheat as long as he makes up for it. We think its ok for a men to abuse us as long as he apologizes and buys us a nice gift. We think its ok because its apart of life. It is not. Or because it happened to Keisha or our mom we get confused by what love really is. We live for the "making up" stuff. But it is all a fascade. Because men know what to do to get us back.
Here is the classics:
1. Apologies (so many that it floods ya emails, texts, and vm's to the point you give in)
2. Gifts (luxury gifts and flowers etc) (things he never really bought you before)
3. Willingness to do anything (mow ya lawn, wash dishes,give up his phone, take you out every weekend etc)
4. Good Behavior but for a limited time (because trust and believe when he see you have forgiven him he will ease back into his old self
6. "I Changed" ( 9 out of 10 its lies) How can a person change overnight? You can't be a cheater all your life and tommorrow you a one woman man.
7. Stunts ( tattoo of your name , fake suicides, quit a bad habit, going over your mom house crying etc) this all to get a reaction out of you. Most women are sensitive so this over the board actions gets us everytime.


But if you know your self worth no amount of gifts, apologies, love or pure "comfort" will allow you to settle for a relationahip that is not in sync with your value as a WOMAN! And if a man tells you, " You won't find another man better than him." You tell him in your best Beyonce voice, "You must not know bout me/ You must know bout me/ I can have another you in a minute and he'll do it way BETTER than you ever did it! Baby!

Always BSB,
Miss BSB
"Self-worth is a direct result of our self-esteem. If our esteem is high than our self-worth is high. Which only allows us to attract and be with people of a higher standard."

UR BEAUTY IS BEAUTIFUL!

We are constantly bombarded with images everyday from the media. We see so many models and and celebrities who are described as being beautiful, sexy, alluring, and attractive. But how many of those images look like us? Don't get me wrong we have Naomi Campbell, Gabrielle Union, Nia Long but they are far and in between. If you really pay attention to the media they kind of the same type that they call "beauty". Tall ,long hair, thin, colored eyes,small lips and fair skinned. Now I am none of those. I am short, brownskin, full lips, shapely, with medium length hair and dark brown eyes. I do not look like the typical girl next door or even a Victoria's Secret model. But I think better yet I know I am beautiful. But than, there are those days ,that I open up a magazine or see a music video and I am questioning my "beauty". Wishing and hoping that I could change my thick legs, have hazel eyes, or even long wavy hair. Sometimes I want to be taller or smaller or something. And yes I have been thru the "I wish my skin was lighter" phase thinking that if it was lighter I would be percieved as more beautiful. But I am so over that...I am a brownie and damn proud!!! I will never be lighter or taller or have bigger breast or lighter eyes..etc I can only be me!!

So this is to say do not get beated down by the media and other people opinions of what beauty is? Your beauty is your beauty! The moment we are able to accept ourselves and embrace our flaws they better we will be. I know this is hard brownies. Especially being a brown girl we are constantly being put to the side as second best but we cant let that ignorance get to us! For every man that don't like brown skin its another man thats loves it! Trust and believe. And whatever you may think is your flaw work on making it your plus. Aceept it and make the best out of what GOD gave you. GOD don't make mistakes. And if you can change it than change it. But never ever never ever never ever try to look like someone else because their beauty is not your beauty. Plus some of the most attractive people have the lowest self confidence and they are unhappy with themselves too. Proving that no one is happy with themselves until they accept their own unique "beauty".

In closing brownies, try your best to accept yourself for who you are. Do not let anyone else beauty standards affect your self esteem. Love the skin your in! Embrace your body and know ur beauty is beautiful!

Always BSB,

Miss BSB

New Year ,New Me, New You!

I hope everyone enjoyed their Christmas and NYE. My Christmas was not so good but my NYE was fantastic. I came home to Philly on new years and spent time with my family. I love them to death. Its almost like a tradition where we make appetizers and party all night long. I swear we do it every year and it never gets old. Love it!
Well now that it is a new year, it means new things and new ideas. A new attitude and maybe a new pair of shoes. LOL I did a self evaluation last year and I seen my flaws. I quit damn there everything I started and made excuses to justify why I did quit. I cried about jobs when in reality I had about 7 jobs within the last year and a half but when I didn't like something I left or never showed up. That is not a good character trait. Whose to say that if I had keep one of those jobs I would of been in NY now instead of Atlanta. How would my life had been if I had finished all the goals I had set?

I like to believe that everything happens for a reason.That through all the trials, errors, and tribulations life is preparing us for a better future. But what if that isn't true? What if life is what we make it? Maybe there isn't some magical reason to why bad shit happens and good things don't. Maybe we make our minds believe that everything happens for a reason so that we can find comfort in the all the disappointing stuff that happens to us. I don't know. But I do know that in 2010 I will change myself for the better and I will continue to throughout my life and not just when a new year begins.

I believe in destiny and that we are all here to be great at something. But destiny isn't enough you have to put hard work behind it and fight for it till the end. I mean do you think people was destined to be crackheads. Hell no! They had a destiny too but they did not take advantage. Faith is only one part. You cant leave it up to GOD or anyone else. Because if you do you maybe waiting forever. For example, there are poor people who to go to church every Sunday but yet they are still poor. They have faith, give tithe and pray but yet they suffer financially. But the preacher has a Benz and a big house and yet he does not suffer financially. Why? Because he put forth the effort rather it was screwing members out there money or making their own christian empires, either way they are not struggling.

My point is that we can have all the things we want in this world with a little faith, hard work, and a plan to get us there. Don't just make a new years resolution make a life resolution. Stick to it and don't give up. Because the moment you do it will take you steps backwards not forward. Life is short. Life is hard. Life will have ups and downs. Life is truly what you make it. So you have to live it fully with no excuses and no fear. Go for it my brownies. Be who it is you want to be! Success and happiness is waiting for you.

Always BSB,
Miss BSB