Once again another little black girl hates her complexion. I am so over this! I went to one of my fav websites Worldstarhiphop.com where I came pass this video of the Tyra Banks show that said, "Beautiful 9 yr old girl on Tyra saying she wish she was light-skinned so boys will like her." OMG Now Tyra Banks is famous for these light vs. dark and color complex issues on her show. (which can really get annoying after a while)But this one video hit me hard. So hard that I had to blog it. Why?
Well, because I was this little girl at some point. I grew up wanting to be lightskinned and have the long "good" hair and pretty eyes. Granted my father is darker than me has light brown eyes and my brother got them. Bastard! LOL And everyone use to say , "How come your eyes not like Jarrett?" I used to be so mad. Plus my father side is native american and black so my aunts and cousins have that pochontas hair but that skipped me too. But back to my point. So I used to look at some of my classmates and neighborhood friends and want to be like them. Never to the extreme where I hated my skin color or hair. But I always wondered if my life was better if I was lighter because it seemed like the lighter girls got all the attention. Now boys liked me and I was always told I was pretty and I never felt ugly. But I did feel the color complex and the difference in how people treated light-skin girls and brownies. Fortunately, for me I got over it and moved on and accepted myself for me. I sometimes still have my moments where I feel inferior to lighter girls and its not because I am not confident. But when you go to the club or look at the media you just start to wonder is it really better being light?
Now, this little girl is either going to accept her skin color and be the baddest brown skin girl alive. Or she is going to forever be ashamed of her complexion. I pray for the latter. Because it is unfair that us brownie have to go through this! It has been going on for hundreds and hundreds of years. When will it ever stop! Maybe colorism is like racism it will never end because it is truly a mental thing that is taught based on your upbringing and environment. I created BrownSkinBeauties for this exact reason to change the thought processes of both the women who suffer from the color complex and the men who feed into it.
Men, especially black men make it so hard for us brownies. And dark skin men are the worst ones. The are the ones who are quick to praise a lightskin girl over a brownie before a lightskin or white man. (when we same complexion!)I say this, because I have personally experienced it. I do believe it's because they suffer from the color complex themselves and to date a person of the same complexion would be to much for their own color issues. Dating a lighter, white or exotic woman makes them feel more like "the man" because a brownie is just not good enough for them. Sometimes I feel like its a cover up for their own self issues and dating someone lighter makes them feel more attractive or accepting of themselves. But this mental state of beauty, hurts the black communtiy, and any other race that suffers from color complex issues. Not only do we have the media, "white standard of beauty" we now have our own black men telling us that we are not beautiful. Treating us as second rate. There is no reason why I have more white men praising my mocha skin color than my own black men. And when you're a child, everything seems so much more harder. It hurts so much more so I know what this 9 yr old girl is feeling. It is not easy to just brush it off when the boy you like is constantly looking over you for the pretty "lightskin girl."
In closing, I am going to need for this color complex ish to stop! Is it going to stop tommorow? No. Is it ever going to stop? I don't think so because it is so much deeper than we think. We have to change how we think and create new standards of beauty because that is the only way we can really step into the right direction. I hope this 9 yr old girl and all the young brownies out there will eventually build their confidence and accept and love their brownskin. Your brownskin is beautiful and do not let anyone tell you any different. Because in 2010, I am not giving into this light vs. dark, I am no longer feeling second to light skin girls or letting any video, media outlet, or man depict my beauty. BROWNSKIN IS IN!!!! AND IM LOVIN IT!! (in my mcd's voice) :)
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